Saskatoon Pie Flailin' and Winnin'

I feel like there's no point in making a pie with a store-bought crust - I might as well buy the whole pie. Crusts can be pretty hard to make though. You have to work really fast and keep your ingredients cold so the dough doesn't get to gluey. Here's my attempt at making one for some saskatoons I picked at Riverbend Gardens here in the city. 

I had to pick all the stems off the saskatoons I picked. Then I rolled out the dough and put it in the pie plate. It did not look pretty





 

 Tossed the saskatoons with sugar, flour, and lemon zest and poured them in the shell with some chunks of butter on top. 

 

 Put the second crust on and cut the excess off (I made a little raspberry tart out of the extra that could be a flail all on its own), then tried to attach the two edges and make them look fancy.

The finished product definitely doesn't look pro but tasted pretty darn good. 

-Stephanie (Food Flail's first guest writer!)

When life gives you melted chocolate...

Make chocolate dip for your cherries!

Directions:

Bring a chocolate bar to your picnic, let it melt in the sun, open from the back and dip fruit into it. What started as a food flail turned into a new amazing tasty treat!

Mmmmm local salad with some success!

A few weeks ago I made a salad with local greens and mushrooms, as well as tiny strawberries and homemade goat cheese (made from milk I milked myself)! The strawberries were tart but delicious; a bit small because I really need to thin the strawberry patch but I am lazy. The goat cheese tasted a bit off... But I tried to enjoy it anyways!! 

Just because you can, doesn't mean you should: kefir edition

I got some kefir grains. I followed the instructions religiously. I made goat milk kefir. It took weeks and I had to pay really close attention to details. It tasted ok. Not like other kefir I'd had before but I chalked that up to the fact that it was warm from fermenting on my counter rather than cold like from the store. Still, I didn't want to leave the house for a few hours in case it made me violently ill. It didn't!!

Here are the instructions: http://www.culturesforhealth.com/kefir

Then I went on vacation and didn't know what to do with my kefir grains. So I googled it and it said to leave them in fresh milk in the fridge and start again upon return. Upon return I discovered a murky jar of yuck, pictured below.

Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. Or feel bad that you don't feel like trying again right now. There's plenty of local delicious goat kefir options available here in Edmonton!! Well actually just one other that I know of. The health benefits of kefir are supposedly very good so I'm not letting my DIY flailure stop me from experiencing it anyways. Maybe I will try again soon!!!

Delicious goat kefir from Happy Days Goat Dairies in Ponoka, AB and Chilliwack, BC. 

Fondant Flail

What Martha Stewart creates with fondant. 

What my friend Jordan and I create with fondant. Big difference in style and taste, I am sure.

Like seriously, what is with that creepy mermaid? And that is not an octopus...it only has six legs...maybe a sextapus?? Hmmmmmmmm

Goat Milk Soap...like Fight Club Without the Human Fat

My friend and I created a concoction of goat's milk (freshly milked by me!) lye, red palm oil (hence the vibrant colour) coconut oil, olive oil, cedar essence and grapefruit seed oil. Not food but definitely along the same lines... And a definite flail. We will see in 4 weeks how it turns out!

Acquiring the milk!

Yup, I'm Edward Norton.

Oily reflections.

Not custard buns... Don't be fooled.

Soap will sleep for 4 weeks!

Welcome to YEG Food Flail

A place for amateur food bloggers and their amateur food pursuits

Martha Stewart. The cooking channel. Internet recipes with perfect photos and impeccable outcomes. The lady at the health food store who insists making homemade kefir and slaughtering your own chickens is child's play. Food blogs!!!! Everything appears so simple, natural, organic and delicious until you try it yourself. And then you fail. Perhaps it's edible. But your head is just above water and you are wallowing in the misery that you are terrible at creating food. The knob on your performance anxiety dial has been cranked clean off.

Following a university project on the books "In Defense of Food" and "The 100 Mile Diet", my personal goal has been to get more in touch with my food, know where it comes from and explore previously uncharted (by me at least) waters in collecting and creating my own food. I've come up with a couple of mottos by which to live by in these pursuits:

"Just because you can, doesn't mean you should"....

and in the words of Master Yoda.... "Do or do not, there is no try."

Here, I join with guest writers, ghost writers and friends to honestly and humbly disclose what continues to ensue as we experience our adventure called Yeg Food Flail.

Join in...and enjoy.

-Bronwen

flail  (fll) n.

A manual threshing device consisting of a long wooden handle or staff and a shorter, free-swinging stick attached to its end.

v. flailed, flail·ing, flails

v.tr.

1. To beat or strike with or as if with a flail: flailed our horses with the reins.

2. To wave or swing vigorously; thrash: flailed my arms to get their attention.

3. To thresh using a flail.

v.intr.

1. To move vigorously or erratically; thrash about: arms flailing helplessly in the water.

2. To strike or lash out violently: boxers flailing at each other in the ring.

3. To thresh grain.